107 Comments
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Claire Collis's avatar

Best response ever. Also, don’t dismiss Sandra, I have a feeling she ends up helping Spanish police uncover an organised crime group leading to the eventual reconciliation with her son and a series on daytime ITV

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Oh my gosh stop this is the perfect spin off. With Miguel as her unlikely assistant. Then she can heckle all the parents watching while standing through the TV every time she sits down. Watch this space 🤣

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Sara Dietz's avatar

I would read this story 😂 new buddy-cop murder of the week! (For real though very similar vibe to Almost Paradise which I loved haha)

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Danusia Malina-Derben's avatar

There’s such mastery here ~ every joke hides a bruise, every line rings true.

You’ve captured the mental gymnastics of motherhood with a precision that’s almost indecent.

If only nuance had better PR.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Mental gymnastics is totally it! And I absolutely love that line - if only nuance had better PR! I am banking that one - what a belter. Thank you for reading ❤️

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Annie’s Journal's avatar

The way people refuse to understand the nuances of motherhood drives me nuts.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Me too! A wilful ignorance to it! It's a wonder I still have a head after all the banging it against brick walls!

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Lauren Baum's avatar

Your humor AND your writing are exceptional

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Jennie is writing's avatar

This is SUCH a nice thing to say! Thank you - genuinely means a lot. <3

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Darby Saxbe's avatar

This article is hilarious and awesome but the funniest part is that you’ll need a WiFi password in 2076.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Hahahaha this really made me laugh. You are so right. I may be alright at writing some funny bits on the internet but my tech foresight is truly in the gutter 😂😂

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BGS's avatar

I know this wasn’t your larger point but I was really struck by the “still manage to have a mostly normal life” comment (paraphrased). Conflating “normal life” with “child free life” feels like a profoundly topsy-turvy worldview! As if the people raising our literal future are living some abnormal “other” life. As if the decision to give up some ease (that you may later *gasp* feel nostalgic for) to take on the profoundly difficult (but rewarding) task of raising another WHOLE HUMAN is some alternate reality you chose and therefore must accept fully without a single thought of the “normal” before you left behind. What if…. Try to follow me here…. Having children — and all the ways they change your life - is having a normal life?

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Jennie is writing's avatar

I actually started writing this piece going in on each individual comment before reining it in 🤣and you’ve actually articulated this point so well. Nail on head. And then we wonder why mothers aren’t allowed to say it’s hard without being accused of regret. Because you chose to leave ‘normal’ behind, didn’t you so just shut up and accept it. That’s the subtext of so many of these comments. Thank you for saying this I totally agree.

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Sam H 🇨🇦's avatar

Even if you do have kids it will only be like that for at MOST ~20 years. Even for parents, living without children is normal, since they spend 75% or so of their lives not living with children.

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Chris's avatar

WTF are you wittering on about?

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Sam H 🇨🇦's avatar

It's pretty simple math. Not sure what's got you confused. Parents don't become magically child-free after raising kids, but they do get their independence back.

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Indy's avatar

It was also “my friends”. No matter how close you are, you don’t see every second of their life, or their inner world. They could be absolutely struggling but put on a front. Unless you’re living it, you have no clue.

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Jennifer L.W. Fink's avatar

“you can miss being able to sit down whenever you want AND think your child is the most incredible thing that’s ever happened to you.” — AMEN! Parenting is both and all and we absolutely must make space for discussing all of it.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Totally agree! There is and must be room for nuance with all things - especially this!

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Kate Howlett's avatar

Hahahaha this made me laugh so much (as did your original humour article, which made laugh and cry because humans are capable of complexity). Wtf, I cannot believe you had to write this response, but I am so glad you did. I honestly don’t understand how anyone could read your pieces properly and not conclude that you just adore being a mother and just adore your son. It’s so blindingly obvious it comes through in every sentence. Wow. The internet. In fact, your love for being a mother and the very real way you write about it makes me even more certain I want it, which just wouldn’t happen without all that love coming through. Thanks for the laugh and heart here, as always 💖

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Jennie is writing's avatar

This has to be my favourite comment on here, thank you. Just really means a lot for you to say and I feel quite emotional about words that I write having a positive effect on you - especially with regard to your own eventual motherhood. Thank you, as always for being so lovely <3

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Kate Howlett's avatar

💗 💗 💗

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Sam Mertens's avatar

Fellow parent here who relates. This was way more explanation than any of those obtuse lumps of presumably human-shaped objects deserved. You are doing god’s work in attempting to enlighten them.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

I can't lie this genuinely made me cackle a very witchy sounding laugh!! Thank you for bringing a smile to my face with this!

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DeMOMcracy's avatar

Haters are going to hate. And humor , especially not the slapstick kind, is the highest indicator of intelligence. I never sat on a couch as a mother and now when my adult sons see me on the couch, they think it’s some serious illness (flu) or injury (recovery from surgery) and offer help, tea, vacuum, clean the bathrooms and take out the trash.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

The fact that your adult sons now panic when they see you on the couch is both hilarious and quite sweet. I am in the phrase where my 2.5 year old will actually find helping with things around the house a big fun deal - it just makes it take 19489845 years longer than me doing it myself 🤣! I'm sure I have approximately 2 years until that is no longer the case 🤣🤣🤣

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Ash BG's avatar

I’m actually obsessed with this. Every. Single. Word.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Thank you! I’m glad you got it!

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Lianne's avatar

I don’t even need to read the original post (but I will) to absolutely applaud you for this. Good on ya.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Thank you so much! It was a wild ride for a moment there haha!

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Mallory's avatar

This was beautiful. As a mom of 3 under 5, I feel the same. I think we all do.

I can’t even bring myself to delete the baby poo pictures that are almost 5 years old 🥲

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Hahahaha I love this so much. I too believe I will have the poo album for many years - including more recent ones of literal turds in a potty... What are we like!

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Lisa's avatar

So good 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

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Jennie is writing's avatar

Thank you so much! <3

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Michelle Lobdell's avatar

😂😂😂 As a mother of five....I laughed out loud, remembering sobbing over a lack of sleep, while simultaneously wishing I had had ten. So many people without a scintilla of English comprehension. I call them out often. Yet another reason to home school.

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Jennie is writing's avatar

FIVE! I am in awe! Sobbing over lack of sleep while wishing you'd had ten is possibly the most perfect encapsulation of parenthood I've ever heard. The exact complexity and nuance I'm talking about here! <3

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Michelle Lobdell's avatar

I HIGHLY recommend it. 🥰

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spinachpaneerlover's avatar

I think the hate represents a kind of cultural immune system. The fact is, women could choose to end humanity if we all decided to stop having kids. Actually, it doesn’t need to be all of us—most countries are already on a trajectory that will lead to extinction.

There can only be so many DINKs, and on some level they know that. They need moms to be happy with their lives. They need women—other women—to keep choosing the mom life.

Having kids is work. Hard work, valuable work. So valuable, actually, that no government could afford to pay parents the market value of the services they freely provide.

That’s why it’s essential for everyone to treat parenting like a super fun hobby. It entices new people into the “profession,” it helps parents manage their inevitable boredom and exhaustion (“but I wouldn’t exchange it for the world!”), and it absolves everyone else from caring too much.

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